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An Indian man was made to strum his beloved guitar during brain surgery - so doctors could make sure nothing went wrong.

Give it a couple of years, this bus will be full of tinted quiffs. And there he is, with a cardigan and a quiff of his own — the twenty-two-year-old Morrissey. Whilst other pupils were somehow hardened by the experience (there were accounts of some pupils fighting back and hitting the teachers) this definitely wasn’t the case for our hero, delicate flower that he is. One his classmates has since eloquently said,'He was too clever for us.

Mark my words.’’Oh.’Anyway, Marr and his mate get off the bus, head to 384 Kings Road and knock on the door. Now as much as I love this story, we have to leave it for a moment so I can just give you more of an idea of who it was that came down those stairs that day. Like virtually all the pupils in his primary school, Morrissey failed his 11 and was sent to a secondary modern school that specialised in preparing teenagers for the factory floor whilst simultaneously physically abusing them via an endless, and at times random, regime of corporal punishment. We were all fucking dur-durs from the council estate fighting each other and robbing each other.

He shouldn’t have been in that school.’Another classmate has said that the young Morrissey avoided the bullishness of the playground and, during breaks, just wandered around the school’s corridors on his own, 'looking at things intently’.

It is the preferred technique for many surgeons in the removal of lesions close to important regions of the brain.

By staying awake, surgeons can continuously monitor that they haven't accidentally affected some of their brain functions.

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